5 Ways to be Happier

Now I'm not claiming to be an expert on stuff like this, but I'm hoping that by writing this post I can maybe inspire someone to rethink even one aspect of their life the way I have been rethinking mine over the past few weeks.

So here it is, folks:

Ellie's Ways to be Happier....ta daaa

1. Stop giving a damn about what other people think about you. I don't know how else to put this. I think that everyone has insecurities in one way or another. I used to care A LOT more about what other people thought of me. But it wasn't in a self-conscious kind of way; it was more a not wanting to let other people in because I was very self-protective. And, whilst it did have some benefits, in hindsight (ahh hindsight, a wonderful thing) being so guarded probably cost me a few opportunities to make some really good friends at the time when everyone else was also finding their feet (more on this in point no. 2!). But Year 12 offered me a fresh start. And with some new-found confidence and self-assurance, I have stopped caring so much. And I feel happier for it. I learnt that people are always going to have opinions on things, but hardly any of those opinions are about me. Some people, believe it or not, actually admire a person who is brave enough to express their individuality. So go for it!

2. Make new friends. This is something that does not come naturally to me at all as I already kinda said in point no.1. But it is something that I have had to do a lot more recently. My two best friends who I always relied on in high school left to go to different colleges this year and initially I was like an internal mess of tears and dread about being all on my own with no one to talk to. But then I began to view it as a challenge. I set myself little personal goals and mental notes about taking steps towards meeting new people. One day I would decide "I'm gonna sit at that table and talk to these people I haven't spoken to in 5 years" and find that I really liked this newly different person. Everyone needs a solid bank of friends they get along with and know are cool enough to have your back. My bank used to be quite small. It still is quite small, but its growing. So I would say, if you're shy or a little introverted like me, set yourself a challenge like I did of maybe talking to one new person everyday. Even if its just a few words, your life will be enriched by interesting people and you might find an awesome new level of happiness because of it!

3. That being said, still allow your old friends to love you. This is VERY important. I feel like the absolute worst thing people can do is shut out the people who care about them most. Don't allow your old friend group to drift from you. They're the ones that have been with you from the beginning -  through the laughs and the tears and the fall outs. Your best friends get you on another level to the rest. Me and my wifeys, as I call them, make conscious efforts to message each other often and we try to meet at least once a week, even if it is for a little coffee date (Costa is literally like our second home by now).
I guess this bit mostly applies to people who don't see their best friends every day, but I honestly believe that having some time apart can be good for a friendship group because when you all come back together again it feels like nothing has changed and you can reminisce on the good ol' days as well as finding out what's new with them in the present tense. Let your friends love you for all your quirkiness. You'll be happier for it.

4. Focus on family. This point is kinda like no.3 in that your family have been with you from day one and will be with you until you die. You love them unconditionally, but at the same time, in a household where everyone is busy doing different things, family bonding time can get left at the sidelines. So, just as with your friend group, I would recommend designating some time every now and again to do something with your family. Play a board game or go to an exhibit, eat a meal or watch a film together. Anything that involves everyone. You'll (me) realise that your annoying little brother isn't actually that bad after all! ;)

5. Last but not least, take a time out. This is your "me time". I think even the most sociable people in the world can't go on living without a little break from the rest of the world to have some time to themselves. This is some time to do something self-indulgent that really makes you happy. It could be a structured activity like a dance class or something more relaxed like baking, reading a book, colouring (who can resist those colouring for mindfulness books at the moment, especially when they are Sherlock-themed hehe) or even taking a bath (LUSH!!). This is your time to breathe. To have your space. To recover. To stay in control of your life and to be happier.

Well that's it from me for now. I hope you found this post useful or at least something to think about. If you have any further tips for how to be happier, leave me a comment below!